A bridegroom who desires to recite the Shema on his wedding night may do so. R. Shimon b. Gamliel said: "Not all who wish to take the Name may do so." [If he is not recognized as a sage and a porush (saintly) in other matters, this is nothing but pride, pluming oneself on exemplary powers of concentration. The halachah is not in accordance with R. Shimon b. Gamliel. We find some of our rabbis saying that today all men should recite the Shema on their wedding night. For since in these generations we do not recite it with much concentration on all the other days, if a bridegroom did not recite the Shema on his wedding night, he would seem even more haughty, giving the impression that he concentrated at all other times except this, being preoccupied with the mitzvah.]
Bartenura on Mishnah Berakhot
לא כל הרוצה ליטול את השם יטול – If he is not considered a Sage and someone distinguished in other things, it would only be considered as excessive pride if he would attempt to show that he can demonstrate spiritual intentionality. And the Halakha does not follow Rabban Gamaliel. And we see that some of our Rabbis who say that nowadays, any person can recite the Shema on the first night (following their wedding) since in these generations, there is not that much spiritual intention on the other days and if he didn’t recite [the Shema] on the first night (following his wedding), it would appear like a greater haughtiness if he is able [to recite the Shema] with spiritual intentionality, in every hour other than now, because of his concern of fulfilling the Mitzvah of “being fruitful and multiplying.”
Ask RabbiBookmarkShareCopy
English Explanation of Mishnah Berakhot
Introduction
In mishnah five we learned that Rabban Gamaliel recited the Shema on the first night of his marriage, even though he was exempt. Today we read of a debate between later sages whether Rabban Gamaliel action sets a precedent for others who might wish to recite the Shema on their wedding night.
Ask RabbiBookmarkShareCopy
English Explanation of Mishnah Berakhot
If a bridegroom wants to recite the Shema on the first night [of his marriage], he may do so. Rabban Shimon ben Gamaliel says: not everyone who desires to take up the name of God may do so. According to the first opinion in the mishnah, just as Rabban Gamaliel recited the Shema on the first night of his wedding, so too anybody can. Rabban Shimon ben Gamaliel, Rabban Gamaliel’s own son, says that his father was an exception. Not everyone can accept upon himself the responsibility of saying the Shema in a situation in which the sages exempted the person. Rabban Shimon ben Gamaliel seems to have an almost entirely different conception of halakhah. Whereas his father considered the halakhah to be geared to the “normal” or “typical” situation and allowed deviations under abnormal circumstances, his son limits these deviations. According to Rabban Shimon ben Gamaliel, halakhah is not just a descriptive norm, but a mandated norm, and even though one does not feel that he fits into this norm, the halakhah establishes that he must. In our case, if one feels that he is capable of concentrating sufficiently to recite the Shema on his wedding night, he is still not allowed to do so. The halakhah mandates his exemption and doesn’t just allow him to not recite it. It seems to me that later halakhah is more often understood in the terms of Rabban Shimon ben Gamaliel. Halakhah mandates laws across the board, usually not making exceptions for the individual psyche. But this is far too broad a topic for this forum.
